Monday, April 13, 2009


I feel like I broke up with a boyfriend or something. I had a terrible falling out with a very good friend of mine. I let my keyboard get the best of me and really let her know how I felt. I was not going to be manipulated and I was not going to be made to feel guilty for something I did not do.

The long and short of it is: while I was in Florida at a grocery store I called her for the recipe for Sangria, then she said "...while I have you on the phone, my sitter canceled, can you watch the kids on Fri when you come home?" (I was irritated that she was asking me this when I was on vacation in the first place) I told her that I would like to help her out but I couldn't commit because Shawn was having surgery that week and the date had not been scheduled yet.

That was that.

I did not call her or hear from her. When I got back Shawn had made plans for us to have lunch with friends, then shopping then going to dinner and to see a band Friday night. When she saw his post on FB, on Monday, she sent me an e-mail saying "Please don't cancel on me!"
I was genuinely surprised. I wrote her back saying that I wasn't canceling because I knew I had not said that I was watching her kids.

Well you can see how this got ugly.
She left me messages on my cell, for me to call her and I didn't. I didn't call because I did not want to deal with her. I knew she was goingt to try to convince me to have Shawn cancel our plans, so I could watch her kids. I knew she was clearly not prepared to take No for an answer and would do whatever she could to make me say yes.

Soooo instead of listening to her, I sent her an e-mail and I told her why I wasn't calling her back and that I know that I had not committed to watching her kids because I did not know when Shawn was having surgery.

Well I know she did find a sitter because I know she did what she had planned.

I figured she got over it but I was wrong. I left her notes and comments on her FB, friendly stuff and it wasn't until last Wed that I realized she hadn't responded to anything I had written. I wrote that I had noticed that she was ignoring me and that we had our traditional Easter Ricotta Pie and Pizza Gaina night coming up and wondering if we were not invited.

Then all hell broke loose.

She wrote me an e-mail saying that she wanted me to acknowledge that a friendship should include respect and courtesy and that was IT for me. I really ripped into her.

I am extremely articulate when I am pissed off and I held nothing back. I was honest, I didn't say anything that wasn't true and I believe that I was in the right but what does it matter now.



Amy said...

Oy!! Boy remind me never to piss you off LOL

I hope that things can cool off and you gain your friend back.



Kim said...

Sorry about the problem with your friend Tina, that really stinks, but you have to be true to yourself. I'm glad you didn't back down! It sounds like she was being completely unfair, but it's never easy to lose a friend...
<3 Kim

Tina said...

Thanks girls. Yeah the whole situation really stinks.